The reality of the events of next week has started to make its ugly appearance in my thoughts and dreams. "I'll be strong for her", I tell myself. And I pray daily for that strength because Lord knows I can't find it within myself alone.
Allison went yesterday and bought a wig, sorry, a "cranial prosthesis" as its called on the receipt and as I will call it when I explain it to Cigna. Dr. Christman wrote a prescription for it so I'm hopeful. It looks great, it seriously looks like Allison's real hair. But as beautiful as it is, I catch myself hating the fact that she has to shop for this while others are shopping for toys, clothes and snowman ornaments. It doesn't seem fair and I've complained to God about it many times. And He's patiently listened to my rants and softly replied "Chris, you don't want me to be fair, you want me to be gracious and merciful." He's so right...it would be "fair" for us to be miserable and dying because of our sin, but our Lord is compassionate and carries us through trials to make us more like Him. And he does carry us, He doesn't simply present a trial and walk away. He doesn't even expect us walk the entire way, he "carries" us if we only trust Him.
So once again this year I find myself thinking "next year I'm gonna really enjoy Christmas". I promise to never take good times for granted and to enjoy each day (or at least try really, really hard). So, remembering that the greatest Christmas Gift was delivered on Easter Sunday...Happy Birthday Jesus, thank you for coming to this dark, filthy place...thank you for experiencing (and conquering) life's trials and for carrying us through ours.
2 comments:
We are praying for God's touch of healing for Allison.
Love this verse: Jeremiah 32: 27 Behold, I AM the LORD, the God of all flesh; is there anything too hard for me?
Blessings,
Pat Tate
I've just finished listening to Third Day on YouTube--love the lyrics:
When the rain comes it seems that everyone has gone away.
When the night falls you wonder if you shouldn't find someplace to run and hide,
Escape the pain.
But hiding's such a lonely thing to do.
I can't stop the rain
From falling down on you again
I can't stop the rain
But I will hold you 'til it goes away.
When the rain comes
you blame it on the things that
you have done.
When the storm fades
you know that rain must fall
on everyone
Rest awhile; it'll be alright
No one loves you like I do
When the rain comes
I will hold you
We've all been reminding each other to pray all day long--Thank you for showing how God is answering.
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